There are some common threads between being a good leader and being a good romantic partner. Nobody is going to be great at either when they’re just starting out — just think back to your first relationship and I’m sure you’ll agree — but with some intentional practice, we can become better leaders and better partners at the same time.

Give feedback in the moment

Nothing is worse than letting a grievance sit and then coming back to it after the other person has moved on. Some people get over things much more quickly than others. If you try to bring something up later, the other person may get confused, defensive, or angry. And small things left unaddressed continue to build up until they become a huge roadblock in your relationship. That can all be avoided by bringing it up in the moment.

Being honest, open, and building trust

Building off of that last point, giving feedback in the moment is what is going to make people learn to trust you. Being honest also empowers other people around you to open up and be their best, and that is the sign of a good relationship in business AND life.

What gets recognized gets repeated

When you see the kind of behavior you want, you have to work to recognize it in a way that acknowledges the other person. This will help that behavior stick and give further clarity to the types of behaviors you want. This also opens the trust door for feedback and makes it easier to breach the conversation around what can be improved.

If you take in these three tips, you’re going to make it a lot of the way towards being great in both leadership AND relationships.

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